<!DOCTYPE html>
<html>
<head>
<meta charset="UTF-8">
<title>Just Warms My Heart by cozywilde, d20crunch</title>
<style type="text/css">

body { background-color: #ffffff; }
.CI {
text-align:center;
margin-top:0px;
margin-bottom:0px;
padding:0px;
}
.center   {text-align: center;}
.cover    {text-align: center;}
.full     {width: 100%; }
.quarter  {width: 25%; }
.smcap    {font-variant: small-caps;}
.u        {text-decoration: underline;}
.bold     {font-weight: bold;}
</style>
</head>
<body>
<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29524836">Just Warms My Heart</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/cozywilde/pseuds/cozywilde'>cozywilde</a>, <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/d20crunch/pseuds/d20crunch'>d20crunch</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Flight Rising [20]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Flight Rising</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Awkward Boners, Awkward Flirting, Awkwardness, Cuddling &amp; Snuggling, Developing Relationship, First Kiss, First Meetings, Friendship, Healing, Holding Hands, Kissing, M/M, Memory Loss, Sleepy Cuddles, Surprise Kissing, they are both so hopelessly awkward</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-02-18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-02-18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-15 17:20:31</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>13,255</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29524836</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/cozywilde/pseuds/cozywilde, https://archiveofourown.org/users/d20crunch/pseuds/d20crunch</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Sutok's expecting his friend Geinkiin to come visit, but he isn't anticipating that he'll bring a visitor - especially not one who seems oddly, intensely affected by his magic.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Nil/Sutok</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Flight Rising [20]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1097709</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Just Warms My Heart</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p><a href="https://toyhou.se/2928282.sutok">Sutok</a>: reclusive (and lonely) caretaker of a multitude of creatures.<br/><a href="https://toyhou.se/2928325.nil">Nil</a>: magical experimentation deadened his nerves and damaged his memories; he struggles to carry on conversations and form friendships. Also he's in a cult.<br/><a href="https://toyhou.se/3332101.geinkiin">Geinkiin</a>: a close friend of both Sutok and Nil who is incredibly enthusiastic about amphibians of any kind.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Sutok brushes ineffectually at himself, trying to dispel the residual stickiness after he’d patted a too-affectionate slarg. The creature burbles happily at the mess it’s made - bright streaks of green slime up Sutok’s arm, not to mention various drips and splatters - before it oozes off to its fellows.  </p>
<p>“Had to be today, buddy?” Sutok sighs, shaking his head fondly as he ducks from the slargs’ cavern. Maybe if he hurries he won’t look like Geinkiin’s radioactive brother by the time he arrives… </p>
<p>Sutok makes his way back along narrow passages to where it’s warmer and drier, slipping into the cavern he’s made his own and crouching down to poke around a laundry pile until he finds a clean-ish rag. He’s barely straightened up before he hears a cheerful hello echoing through the caves. Sutok sighs again and makes for the door, doing what he can to wipe himself down as he calls back, “Coming! Stay there please!” He certainly doesn’t want another episode of Geinkiin losing his way while looking for toads again. </p>
<p>Thankfully, it seems Geinkiin has listened when Sutok turns the corner, a familiar broad shape outlined in the mouth of the cave. “Geinkiin, hello -” he says happily, then falters. Squinting against the bright sun his vision isn’t all that good yet, but it seems there’s another shape along with him. “Ah - and, who is - who’s this?” Sutok quickly tucks the dirtied rag in the back of his belt, not sure what this newcomer will think of it. He glances helplessly to Geinkiin as he tentatively steps closer, only now realizing he’d stopped at all. The newcomer looks… tired, mostly, now that Sutok’s eyes have started to adjust. When he meets their pale gaze Sutok hurriedly looks away, uncomfortable. “Did you both want to come in, or…?” Looking back to Geinkiin, Sutok hopes his expression communicates the “<em>who is this and why are they here?” </em> that he doesn’t want to say aloud.</p>
<p>“Hi Sutok!” Geinkiin beams, reaching out to rest a heavy hand on the imperial’s dusty shoulder. For a moment Sutok worries it will get Geinkiin dirty, but almost laughs to himself when he realizes his friend is already thoroughly speckled with mud. <em> Where did he even </em> find <em> mud in the desert? </em> Sutok wonders, his musing almost causing him to miss Geinkiin’s response. “This is my buddy, Nil,” Geinkiin says. “A few days ago I was talking to him about this new toad I caught - an orchid speckled one, huge mouth, had some weird teeth, and I think a horn or -” Geinkiin’s excited description cuts off abruptly, suddenly realizing he’s rambling. “Well I’ll tell you about the toad later. Point is, Nil knows a lot about familiars, and when I told him about the cool ones in your cave he positively lit up!” </p>
<p>Glancing over the newcomer, Sutok has a hard time believing the other imperial had “lit up” - not a single expression has crossed his face since their arrival. He just looks so <em> weary</em>, most of his weight leaning against Geinkiin’s broad side and blinking unusually slowly, and Sutok was starting to worry he might just fall asleep on his feet. </p>
<p>“So I said ‘hey I’m gonna go visit Sutok tomorrow, you wanna come?’,” Geinkiin continues, smiling at Nil before looking back to Sutok. “And Nil was like, ‘sure I guess’, which like… that’s the most enthusiastic response I think <em> anyone </em> has gotten from him about <em> anything</em>.” </p>
<p>That much Sutok can certainly believe, and he’s surprised when Nil nods and brushes a strand of hair back behind his ear. “I am very enthusiastic about animals,” Nil says, and it’s almost laughable how much his tone does not match his words. “Enthusiasm” was certainly not in his voice - exhaustion maybe, but the soft monotone was far from enthusiastic. “I’m particularly fond of shattered serpents, and familiars created through alchemical means…” Sutok feels warm under Nil’s pale gaze, pretty sure the other imperial was giving him a once-over - it was a bit hard to tell without pupils. “I assume you have a new brood of slargs, judging by the residue on your arm. The young ones have a particularly light shade of slime, depending on how healthy they are. Judging health is….” </p>
<p>Tilting his head slightly to the side, Nil is quiet for longer than Sutok thinks would be necessary for a pause, and he almost opens his mouth to fill the awkward silence but a questioning glance at Geinkiin makes him hold his comment. The snapper shakes his head ever so slightly at Sutok before cheerfully saying, “the health of slargs?” and nudging Nil’s arm. </p>
<p>Nil tilts his head back toward Sutok, blinking a couple times and moving to brush hair behind his ear again despite the fact the strand from earlier is still properly in place. “The health of slargs,” Nil echoes, voice so quiet and lost. He’s silent another few moments before Geinkiin nudges him again, a little more firmly, and Nil self-consciously rubs his forehead. “I apologize, I don’t… I don’t remember where I was going with that,” Nil sighs, and it’s clear from his tone that this is a phrase he says quite often. </p>
<p>He looks like he’s going to say more, but Geinkiin jumps in with a bubbly “that’s okay Nil!” before he can continue. “I’m sure you’ll remember if Sutok shows us the new baby slargs! You can check their slime color, and maybe give him some tips to keep them healthy?” Geinkiin looks to Sutok for confirmation, Nil already nodding his agreement. His gaze is assessing as it flicks over Sutok, but it’s far softer than it was when they’d first arrived.</p>
<p>“Yeah… yeah, sure, that’d be great actually,” Sutok says, after a pause that drags on just long enough to be awkward. For him, anyway - Geinkiin is his usual cheerful self, and Nil remains utterly unreadable to him. Sutok turns back to the cave entrance and gestures for his visitors to follow, pausing just inside the cave to let their eyes adjust to the dimness. “They really are quite young… I think so, anyway. T’Vran said she found them in a trash bin in a back alley somewhere… I’m not very familiar with this sort of creature, unfortunately.” Sutok frowns, still unhappy with himself for taking on animals that he didn’t know the proper way to care for. T’Vran had shrugged and said it was him or nothing when she’d brought them, which was true… but Sutok hates to think he might accidentally hurt them. </p>
<p>Realizing he’s been standing there in silence for… he doesn’t even know how long, Sutok abruptly turns down one of the many twisting passages off the entrance. The lights along the tunnel have dimmed in his absence, so Sutok reaches out to send a pulse of fire magic down the hallway to relight them. </p>
<p>Out of the corner of his eye he catches Nil flinch back at the sudden brightness, and he gives a hasty “Sorry! I’m, um…” Sutok glances to the floor, watching the puffs of dust his feet kick up as he walks. “I’m usually alone down here, so I didn’t think… sorry.” </p>
<p>Geinkiin gives an easy, “That’s all right, buddy, just warn us next time.” Nil stays silent.</p>
<p>Sutok nods sheepishly and continues on, looking back every so often to make sure they’re both still following. Geinkiin comments every so often as they pass offshoots, prompting him with questions like “Aren’t all of the reptiles down that way?” and “Did you ever find a good home for that roc you had over there?” until he gives a brief, stumbling backstory of whatever creature Geinkiin mentioned. Eventually it dawns on Sutok that, as their guide, he should probably not just lead them silently through a labyrinth of dim caverns, and he starts at least telling them what areas they’re passing. </p>
<p>He gets some quiet sounds of acknowledgement from Nil and more cheerful questions from Geinkiin then, until they finally turn a corner and Sutok says, “Well, uh… here we are. Slargs.” He gestures to a small cavern - small in the sense that it wouldn’t be appropriate for a pride of warcats, but (he hopes) large enough for the little slimy creatures. They burble happily at their approach, and Sutok presses his hand to the ward at the mouth of the cave to dispel it. “You can go in, if you’d like to take a look at them,” he says. Geinkiin looks as excited as Sutok would expect - he loves any animal as eager to get messy as he is - while Nil looks… well. Largely the same. Sutok wonders if he’s imagining the tiny spark of interest in those tired eyes, but he does watch him carefully, curious to see what he thinks of the creatures.</p>
<p>As Sutok is beginning to expect, Nil is quiet for much longer than is normally comfortable, but the way he looks at the happily burbling tiny slargs as they ooze their way closer makes him forget the awkwardness. His eyes are so… soft? They had been dull and icy before, but as they had chatted walking through the cave and now as they watch the familiars, Nil’s gaze seems to grow ever warmer. Finally, he says, “They look very healthy,” and steps past the ward into the enclosure. </p>
<p>Geinkiin is quick to follow, immediately crouching down to be closer to the slargs’ level - of course, he’s still like a mountain compared to them. “Careful if you touch them,” Nil murmurs, looking back at Sutok as well, his words for both of them. “Depending on the materials used in their creation, their skin can cause a rather painful rash over time. I think I read a case study on…” Nil’s head tilts to the side, an unconscious gesture that Sutok is quickly gathering means that his mind has drifted from the conversation at hand. </p>
<p>While Nil is silent Sutok steps inside the barrier and seals it up again, bending down just in time to scoop up one of the darker slargs merrily oozing its way towards the open ward. Remembering Nil’s words about a rash, Sutok hastily sets the slarg down again and pulls his rag from where it’s tucked in his belt. His eyes flick to Nil’s while he wipes his hand of slime, and he startles a bit when he meets the other imperial’s soft gaze. Nil doesn’t say anything further, though, and Sutok is grateful when Geinkiin breaks the silence with delightedly cooed praises for the slargs. </p>
<p>“Look at you good slimy babies, is Sutok taking good care of you?” Geinkiin says, pulling on one of his work gloves before delicately petting a tiny slarg head. The little creature burbles its enjoyment and Sutok can’t help a little smile at seeing this huge, sometimes clumsy man delicately handle something so small. </p>
<p>“Normally tar-troopers and algae-bottoms aren’t found in the same brood. You have a very special nest here,” Nil says eventually. “You have exceptional skill and instincts to create this environment for them, despite not having much experience with alchemical familiars. They’re very lucky to have you.” </p>
<p>Though Nil’s voice is as soft and monotone as ever, Sutok can still feel how sincere he’s being, and the praise makes a proud warmth blossom in his chest. “I take the care of the clan’s familiars very seriously, and I’m glad my best guess paid off,” Sutok says with a slight smile, more at ease now that they’re discussing his work. “Do you have any suggestions for improvements?” </p>
<p>This time, Sutok is prepared for Nil’s extremely long pause, and simply focuses on cleaning the slime from his skin while he waits for Nil’s chin to tilt back toward him. Finally, Nil says, “You should have more than one pool of water for them. One should be more acidic than the other. The tar-troopers will be more sensitive to such changes than their siblings, so it’s important that they have access to varying acidity levels.” Nil looks like he’s going to say more, but his gaze drifts to the dark slarg Sutok had set down earlier, which is now oozing around the ward making confused noises. </p>
<p>While he waits for Nil’s attention to return, Sutok ponders the best way to get the two different pools into the slarg’s enclosure, and makes a mental note to check his storeroom of care-taking supplies later that night. As he’s going through his mental checklist of water basins, he notices that Geinkiin has somehow managed to get six of the tiny slargs to crawl over his arms, each leaving a thick trail of mucus in its wake. He laughs, “Oh man, I’m gonna have the worst rash tomorrow!” </p>
<p>After a shorter pause than before, Nil blinks a couple times and turns toward Geinkiin, the ghost of a smile playing on his lips before quickly fading away. “Here, let me…” Nil reaches forward to rest a hand on Geinkiin’s shoulder, and the silvery mist of ice magic flutters around Nil’s fingers. Geinkiin shivers at the feeling before Nil takes his hand and the magic away. Nil then turns to Sutok, extending his hand toward him and cocking his head to the side. “Would you like me to as well?” Nil murmurs. “Just a little ice magic, a bit of healing and protection. It’ll soothe any burning from the slarg slime and prevent a rash tomorrow.”</p>
<p>“Oh… yes, that’s very kind of you,” Sutok says. He steps closer, holding out his hands towards Nil. As the other imperial reaches for him Sutok shuts his eyes and braces for what will no doubt be a very uncomfortable sensation - he’s had to go to Inara for some of the more extreme bites and clawings he’s had, and the sharp bite of her magic stitching skin back together is particularly painful for him, antithesis to the fire magic that runs through his own veins. </p>
<p>After a too-long pause where nothing happens Sutok cracks his eyes open again, dismayed to see Nil pulling his hand back with a profound sadness in his pale eyes. “No, wait, I’m sorry,” Sutok says, hurriedly reaching out and taking Nil’s hand in both of his. Nil startles slightly, hand tugging back for a moment before he stills and stares unblinking at Sutok. “I’m sorry,” Sutok says again. “I didn’t mean… ice magic sometimes hurts for me. I didn’t mean to offend you…” </p>
<p>Nil just stares at him for another long moment, but now Sutok can recognize this kind of pause as him thinking. “I don’t want to hurt you,” Nil finally says, his voice even quieter than before. </p>
<p>“I believe you,” Sutok says quickly, blinking in surprise as Nil looks almost confused. “Here, you can do it now. You said it won’t hurt and I believe you.” Sutok lets go of Nil’s hand and lays his own in it, meeting his eyes this time as he waits for his fingers to light with that silvery magic again. First, though, Nil just blinks, eyes dropping to their hands and then back to Sutok’s. “Go ahead,” Sutok says, giving him the tiniest encouraging smile. </p>
<p>He gets another long, slow blink, and then an odd sensation creeps up his arms. It’s almost as if he’s plunged his hands into cool water, and Sutok can truly relax with a sigh of relief as the soothing magic plays over his skin. It slows to a stop and Nil moves to take his hand away, but Sutok catches it and gives it a quick squeeze before he lets it go. </p>
<p>Fingers still tingling from Sutok’s touch, Nil is quite convinced the other imperial must have accidentally cast some fire magic in response to his own ice magic. He cocks his head to the side, considering - <em> I didn’t see any embers or feel a surge of energy besides my own… perhaps he didn’t cast anything after all. </em> Nil’s skin feels so warm and <em> wonderful</em>, the innate fire magic so soothing when combined with his own. Even when Sutok isn’t actively using magic, Nil can feel it in his veins, hot and eager as it pulses over his senses. Most physical sensations were dulled for him, but being so close to a magic user sent novel sparks of feeling tingling in his deadened nerves, a feeling that is absolutely addicting. </p>
<p>“Thank you,” Sutok says, breath catching at the look of quiet wonder in Nil’s eyes. Sutok can only stand it for a moment, eyes dropping back to the slargs. “Are you looking for your new pool, little one?” he coos, quickly scooping up the one that’s still poking determinedly at the ward. “I’ll have it for you soon. Um -” Sutok turns back to Nil, nodding towards the slarg he’s holding. “Is it all right for him to be close to the ward like that? I don’t know if magic could adversely affect them…” Nil gives a slow blink, but doesn’t otherwise acknowledge his words. It’s becoming easier to read the man’s expressions, as minute as they are, and it is quite clear Nil had not registered his question. “The wards? Are they safe?” Sutok repeats patiently, stepping closer to Nil again. </p>
<p>It takes a couple more moments, but Nil finally inclines his head back toward Sutok, murmuring a quiet, “the wards are safe for them, they just shouldn’t be around more alchemical magic.” </p>
<p>Sutok nods, giving the squirming slarg a calming squeeze before setting it down again. It happily oozes back to continue poking at the ward, and Sutok can’t help smiling at its determination. </p>
<p>When he turns back he finds Nil much closer than before, surprised the man could move so quietly on the cave floor. He meets flat, white eyes, but is calmed by the softness he finds in them. </p>
<p>“Can I… ask about these marks?” Nil says, reaching out slowly for Sutok’s arm - anything to touch him again. Sutok doesn’t pull away, so he rests a gentle hand on his forearm, thumb carefully tracing a rune there. Immediately, the fire magic in Sutok’s veins seeps into Nil’s nerves, warming him all the way up to his shoulder. He can’t help a quiet sigh, imagining the intensity of the heat if Sutok ever actively used his magic on him. Not being able to feel many physical sensations was painful in its own way, but Nil is grateful for his heightened magical sense nonetheless. “I don’t think I recognize the script… do they help with your magic?”</p>
<p>“Y-yes,” Sutok says, the brush of Nil’s cool fingers over the rune sending a (wholly pleasant) shiver through him. “They’re… for channeling, and some binding. Most of them help me manage all of the wards through the cave… I’ll feel it if they’re disturbed, or I can check on them, like this.” Sutok hesitates, looking up from where his eyes had caught on the slow slide of Nil’s thumb over his skin. “Is it alright if I show you? It won’t… affect you somehow?” </p>
<p>Nil already looks sleepier after just touching the dormant runes, and it takes a long moment for him to look up and meet Sutok’s eyes. “I don’t think it will harm me,” he says slowly, a tiny furrow between his brows. </p>
<p>“You’re sure?” Sutok asks again, and Nil gives a slow nod. “Alright then…” Sutok closes his eyes to concentrate and sends a pulse of warm magic out, feeling it trace along his runes like sparks along tinder before it radiates out through the cave. The feedback is immediate, a reassuring series of crackling pings back like a cheery bonfire. It makes him give a tiny, pleased smile, reassured that all of his charges are well. </p>
<p>As soon as Sutok activates his runes, Nil is lost under the surge of warm energy. The heat wakes up all his cold, tired nerves, overwhelming him with sensation. The intensity makes his breath catch, eyes falling half lidded as he concentrates on each little spark of feeling. Sutok’s magic feels so safe and protective, fluttering in delight when its caster smiles and making Nil’s lips turn up just slightly in response. Fire magic feels like simple, pure joy, flickering excitedly along the lines of Nil’s ice magic where it courses in his veins and turning it into a soothing contentment.</p>
<p>Sutok opens his eyes again and gasps, reaching out to cradle Nil’s face in his hands. His eyes have gone faraway and vacant, and he almost sways in place, as if he can hardly keep his feet. “Oh Caller no, Nil, can you hear me?” Sutok says, anxiously waiting for Nil to reply. Too late he realizes his palms are still hot with the echoes of his magic, but he’s scared to stop touching Nil too, not sure he’ll stay standing without Sutok steadying him. And Nil almost seems to be… leaning into the touch? “Nil?” Sutok tries again, softer this time. “Are you alright?”</p>
<p>Nil’s so captured by the intensity of the fire magic that it takes the careful brush of Sutok’s thumbs over his cheeks to finally get his attention. Nil blinks at him slowly, just now registering the warm palms cradling his face and how incredibly <em> close </em> the other imperial is. In the next moment he realizes Sutok is supporting most of his weight, hands splayed across Sutok’s chest as Nil leans heavily against him. There’s a heat under his hands wholly unrelated to the fire magic, and Nil tilts his head to the side to consider what it could mean. <em> Is he… blushing? </em> </p>
<p>“Nil, I’m sorry, are you alright?” Sutok asks again, concern written all over his face. </p>
<p>“Alright?” Nil says finally, voice so soft Sutok has to lean in a bit more to hear him. “Warden… I feel wonderful. Your magic is…” Nil closes his eyes, allowing himself to tilt his head into one of Sutok’s warm hands. “…it is very nice. It must have taken you a long time to perfect your ward-checking system.” </p>
<p>Wholly unwilling to pull away from such a sturdy support, Nil keeps leaning into Sutok’s chest as he savors the lingering embers of feeling still sparking in his nerves. They’re fading fast now that Sutok isn’t actively using his magic, leaving the familiar numbness in their wake, and Nil can’t help a quiet sigh when they die away. Carefully, Nil moves to stand upright again, grateful for the way Sutok holds tight to him, clearly worried he could collapse without support. When Sutok is satisfied he won’t fall over, Nil reaches up to rest a hand on Sutok’s own where it is still pressed to his cheek. “I did not mean to scare you,” Nil murmurs. “It did not harm me, I was… affected a bit more than I expected is all. I do not get a lot of fire magic back home.” Nil keeps steady eye contact even as warmth blossoms on Sutok’s cheeks, quite aware his pupil-less stare was probably unnerving, but wholly unwilling to look anywhere else.</p>
<p>Normally Sutok would have looked away long before now, but something about the way Nil gazes at him - unblinking and certain - makes him unwilling to turn from the other imperial’s pale eyes. “I’m just… glad you’re okay,” Sutok finally manages, breath sighing out in belated relief. He should probably pull his hands away, but Nil doesn’t seem to be bothered by his own hand resting on Sutok’s chest, and the other keeps one of Sutok’s hands pressed firmly to his cheek. </p>
<p>There’s something odd about the way Nil feels, an immovable coldness that’s just similar enough to Inara that Sutok guesses it may just be an ice thing. Not that he’s been this close to Inara - to anyone, really - in some time… Sutok swallows hard, realizing suddenly that he’s leaned in at some point, apparently just as eager to revel in this touch as Nil is. His heart hammers in his chest, hard enough that he’s sure Nil must be able to feel it under his palm. And through this far-too-long silence he keeps staring at Sutok, not pulling away, and so gods-damned <em> close </em> that Sutok can’t be blamed for what he does next. </p>
<p>With barely a breath between them he leans in to press a kiss to Nil’s lips, finally breaking that steady stare as his eyes slide closed. Nil is so cold that it’s instinctive to exhale warmth into his mouth, a gentle breath of warm magic between the press of their lips.</p>
<p>The warm puff of fire magic from Sutok’s breath sends tingling sensations over Nil’s lips, skittering eagerly along the pathways of his own magic and leaving his skin delightfully hot. He can feel the firm press of Sutok’s lips against his own, a sensation he struggles to remember the last time he felt. With Sosdothur and Viidost, he was always far too numb to feel most of what they did to him - light and arcane magic not enough of a counter to his own ice magic to light up his deadened nerves. With <em> fire </em> magic though… he’s so overwhelmed by the novelty of Sutok’s touch that he can’t do much else besides stand there while Sutok kisses him. Sutok drops his free hand to Nil’s chest, a mirror to Nil’s hands on his, steadying himself now. </p>
<p>The hand moving to rest on Nil’s chest makes him shiver, a little of the residual ward magic seeping into his veins. He can feel the drum of Sutok’s heartbeat against his own hand where it presses against bare skin, and his exhausted mind struggles to remember what that means. <em> He’s flushed, his heart is pounding, he’s kissing me… is he… interested in me? </em> </p>
<p>This closeness feels so good, a sweet exhilaration that sends Sutok’s heart soaring - but then he falters. Under his palm Sutok feels nothing but a cool firmness, nothing even close to his own heady delight, not even the <em> hint </em> of a heartbeat, let alone the excited drum of his own heart. <em> Is Nil even affected at all? </em>Sutok’s insides go as icy as Nil’s magic at the thought that his impulsive touches are unwanted, and he starts to pull away. Quietly, he murmurs, “I… I’m so sorry, I don’t know what came over me.”</p>
<p>Never aware of how much time has passed while he thinks, Nil’s stomach turns fretfully when he realizes it must have been awkwardly long, feeling Sutok pull away from his unresponsive lips even as Nil quickly holds his hand more firmly against his cheek. “Sutok,” Nil says, noticing he’s rapidly losing the imperial’s attention as he starts to question himself, offering another quiet, “I should have asked, that was uncalled for,” as he drops his hand from Nil’s chest. Not quite able to process all that is happening so quickly, Nil can feel his focus starting to slip, but he laces his fingers tightly with Sutok’s in an attempt to keep himself grounded. </p>
<p>Sutok blinks at him, finally registering the firm hold on his hand, and how much warmer Nil’s cheek has gotten compared to when he first leaned in. With effort, he meets Nil’s pale eyes, surprised to find a smolder of… <em> something </em> in his pupil-less gaze. “Sutok,” Nil says again, more firmly this time. “Please don’t pull away, it will make me think you regret kissing me.” He pauses, wanting to be sure his next words don’t sound as airy as his usual speech. It’s clear Sutok wants to say something, but even in the short time since they met he’s starting to recognize the difference between Nil’s “I’m thinking” and “I am not paying attention to you” expressions. </p>
<p>Finally, Nil says, “You should have asked, but I enjoyed it. And I would enjoy kissing you more. Being close to you is…” He’s quiet again, gaze sliding off to the side as he ponders his next words. Not wanting to lose his train of thought when it’s so important, Nil just says the first things that come to mind instead of thinking about them too long: “Warm. Comforting. Overwhelming.” Nil blinks slowly at the stunned imperial, starting to rub a slow circle with his thumb on his chest, absolutely captured by the thunder of a heartbeat under his touch. “I would like to be close to you as much as possible,” he continues, utterly honest. He knows it’s selfish, already addicted to the sparks of Sutok’s fire magic and how it gives him brief glimpses of sensation, but Sutok was the one who first leaned in for a kiss so…</p>
<p>“Oh,” Sutok breathes, his own mind struggling to process all that Nil had said. He can’t say he had any preconceptions about how Nil would react to an impulsive kiss - Sutok hadn’t even thought about it for a moment before he just <em> did </em> it - but he can’t imagine this being the result either way. Nil still stands so close to him, the soft brush of his thumb on Sutok’s chest a strange combination of grounding and titillating. “You want… to be close to me?” Sutok repeats, unable to keep the disbelief out of his voice. Certainly, Nil seems intrigued rather than distasteful of Sutok’s chosen profession, and doesn’t seem to mind the dirt and smells that often accompany it, but Sutok still finds it odd that he’d say such a thing, let alone mean it. But Nil gives another slow nod, so Sutok cautiously moves to reclaim the half-step he’d taken back. When Nil allows it - <em> is that the tiniest hint of a smile at the corner of his mouth? </em> - Sutok slides his arms around him too. </p>
<p>His skin does feel oddly cold, as if he’d just come in from a long walk on a frigid winter day, so maybe the warmth of Sutok’s does feel good. With hardly a thought he starts rubbing slow circles into Nil’s back, fingers giving off an eager warmth to chase away that chill. “Close like this? Or…” Sutok falters, caught between warring impulses to give this oddly compelling man whatever he might want or to show that Sutok does, indeed, have civilized manners most of the time. “Or would you like more than that?” Sutok hesitates, then compromises with the softest brush of another kiss, forcing himself to pull back after just a few moments so Nil actually has a chance to respond.</p>
<p>Nil blinks at him, so slow it makes Sutok tired just watching him. As the soft fire magic from Sutok’s fingers sinks into his skin, Nil instinctively presses even closer to the man in front of him. He can <em> feel </em> things, every hot breath against his lips, each careful brush of Sutok’s hand, the excited thrum of a heartbeat under his fingers. The fire burns in his veins so harshly it’s almost painful, like running your hands under hot water after nearly getting frostbite - a needling pain that hurts as much as it soothes. “More…?” Nil breathes when he finally remembers Sutok had said something. </p>
<p>As much as it hurts to have the fire magic light up his deadened nerves, Nil is enthralled by having <em> any </em> sensation, especially as the novelty of feeling starts to wear off and Sutok’s touch feels only <em> wonderful</em>. He lets out a soft, pleased sigh, letting his eyes slip closed again to focus on the feeling of the man pressed against him. Hot. Firm. A little scratch from his beard. The way his bare skin gives under the press of Nil’s hand. His shudder as Nil’s other hand slides carefully down his side, finally resting at the hem of his pants, and the resultant rush of blood to Sutok’s chest and thundering heartbeat. </p>
<p>Nil cocks his head to the side, automatic impulse to find as much warmth as he can to chase the addicting sensations, and carefully slides the tips of his fingers under the hem of Sutok’s pants. He feels a startled little gasp against his lips, and upon blinking his eyes open he’s met with a very flushed expression and an almost panicked gaze, so Nil immediately slides his hand back to Sutok’s hip. “I’m sorry, does that hurt?” Nil murmurs, already hating himself for causing this sweet, warm man any pain. “Being held like this is enough, I just… I am not sure what you mean by ‘more’. I would like to be warmer, but I am not sure how else to do that except to be under your clothes.” </p>
<p>He speaks with such honest confusion that Sutok can’t help being endeared - <em> does he really not know what it means to stick your hand down someone’s pants? </em> “Well - that is - hm,” Sutok clears his throat, trying to find a phrasing that won’t offend Nil. “You aren’t <em> wrong </em>, under my clothes is warmer, and it definitely doesn’t hurt, but - I’m not exactly comfortable with someone I’ve only met a short while ago putting their hands down my pants.” Sutok laughs self-consciously, a low rumble that Nil leans into without thinking. “I know, that’s pretty hypocritical of me, but I hope you know that you can always tell me if I’ve stepped over a line. So… that’s a line for me. Nothing under the clothes yet, alright?” Sutok brushes a kiss over Nil’s cheek to soften his words, giving him a little squeeze around the waist to match. “Maybe we can head back to my room, cuddle up under some blankets, and you can tell me a bit more about these little guys?” </p>
<p>Sutok tilts his head towards the slargs, back to playing with each other now that their visitors have stopped paying much attention to them. Realization hits and Sutok groans. “Oh gods, where’s… we lost Geinkiin.” And he has no idea how long ago he’d left, but with his luck it’s been plenty of time to make it to the spider cave. “Nil, I really should try to find him before he stumbles into anything unfortunate… do you want to come?” Sutok’s voice is noticeably regretful, his arms subtly tightening around Nil as he contemplates the idea of letting him go.</p>
<p>“Oh, yes. I think I did overhear him muttering about sneaking off to see your wartoads while you were distracted… I did not realize I was part of the distraction.” Nil sighs heavily, letting his head fall forward to rest on Sutok’s shoulder. “I am sorry… I did not mean to make you neglect your duties.” He starts to pull away but Sutok reflexively squeezes him tighter, starving for the comforting weight against his chest. Confused, Nil tilts his head to meet his eyes, even further befuddled to find he doesn’t look annoyed. Then again, he was never very good at reading people. </p>
<p>“It’s okay Nil, I’m sure Geinkiin would have found a way to sneak off no matter what,” Sutok says, chuckling a little when he remembers Geinkiin’s last visit and how he somehow ended up in the pool with the mantarune. “In fact, knowing he wanted to see the wartoads helps tremendously. We can start there.” </p>
<p>Nil blinks at him slowly, struggling to understand why Sutok is so quick to forgive. Sutok just smiles patiently, content to rub idle circles in Nil’s back and let his ambient fire magic warm him. He doesn’t remember Inara being <em> quite </em> this affected, and is starting to think this reaction to magic might just be a Nil thing rather than an Ice thing, when he notices Nil’s expression shift from the now-familiar “thinking” one to something else. “Nil…?” Sutok murmurs, resting a hand on his cheek to try to capture his attention again. </p>
<p>Nil’s pale eyes flick back to his, giving a little startled jolt at seeing him so close. “Oh, Sutok, I, ah…” Nil’s jaw clenches, so gods-damn <em> frustrated </em> with himself for losing the train of thought. “I’m sorry, we were talking and…” </p>
<p>Sutok smiles warmly, quickly interrupting to reassure him. “I was mostly thinking out loud about where to look for Geinkiin. You suggested the wartoads, and I thought that was a great idea.” </p>
<p>Coaxed by Sutok’s magic, Nil lets a tiny smile tug at his lips, slowly leaning forward to drop a light kiss on his cheek. He still isn’t sure why Sutok isn’t frustrated with him yet, but he is certainly not going to question it. “Ah, yes, that sounds familiar. And I would like to take up your offer of going to your room, but ensuring Geinkiin is safe is more important,” Nil murmurs. “And… thank you for being honest with me about your boundaries. It is…” He swallows self-consciously, unsure how much he wants to disclose to his new friend. “…difficult, for me to interpret others. I prefer to simply be told what is needed or unwanted, with the understanding that… I may need to be reminded many times.” Nil presses another careful kiss to Sutok’s lips before reaching down to take his hand, contently twining their fingers together. “Can I hold your hand while we search for Geinkiin?”</p>
<p>“Oh yes, I was about to suggest that myself,” Sutok says, smiling as he squeezes Nil’s fingers. He lets himself savor Nil’s closeness for one more long moment before he pulls away with a sigh, leaving their hands entwined as he tugs Nil towards the door. “Goodbye, little ones,” Sutok says, nudging that one determined slarg back from the door before he quickly slips out, Nil in tow. </p>
<p>He puts the ward back up immediately, grinning as he hears a frustrated whine from the other side. “Gotta watch that one,” he says to himself, then glances up and down the corridor. Right is back the way they came, but left is the faster route to reach the wartoads. Sutok hums in consideration, then turns left. Better to be quick in case Geinkiin knows the fast way too, and there isn’t <em> too </em> much the way they came that would cause Geinkiin trouble. Of course, this assumes Geinkiin remembers anything of the tunnel system… but still, they need to start somewhere. </p>
<p>“This way has some of the bigger, deeper caverns,” Sutok explains, squeezing Nil’s hand with a little burst of warm magic as he starts to lead the way. “Fortunately, there aren’t many of them, so checking them should be quick. Unfortunately… well, big caverns hold big creatures. Oh, Geinkiin…” Sutok sighs. He can certainly relate to Geinkiin’s desire to learn about animals like the wartoads firsthand, but it doesn’t stop him from worrying. He does feel better with Nil at his side - even as a silent companion as they walk briskly through the winding tunnels, his steady breaths and the firm press of his fingers are reassuring. Soon, the first entrance yawns open before them, its shimmering ward intact - but that doesn’t mean anything, as Geinkiin has slipped through Sutok’s wards before somehow. </p>
<p>Sutok pauses, Nil coming to an agreeable halt at his shoulder. Listening for a moment, there’s what sounds like a low, sleepy croak every so often - but definitely not a brawl or a chase, at least not yet. “Okay,” Sutok sighs, relieved, and turns back to Nil. Whatever he was about to say - a report, a plan - he can’t even remember, the firm press of Nil’s lips so cleanly wipes the thought from his mind. </p>
<p>Sutok lets out a soft murmur, deepening the kiss with another breath of fire magic that Nil responds to with a gentle squeeze of their twined fingers. Gods, it just feels so <em> good</em>. Sutok rests his free hand against Nil’s cheek, stroking his cheekbone and feeling warmth bloom under his fingertips - not a blush, really, but a reaction to the magic that thrums through the lines of runes that touch his skin. A louder croak echoes through the corridor, and Sutok breaks away with a gasp. </p>
<p>“Nil, please, we have to -” he gasps, glancing back towards the ward. “Geinkiin. Geinkiin needs us to help him. The wartoads, Nil, remember?” It’s harder to read Nil’s eyes in the darkness of the corridor, but Sutok thinks he’s pondering his words at least, and he keeps stroking over his cheek with warm fingers, hoping it’s grounding rather than distracting.</p>
<p>The soft brush of Sutok’s fingers send a delightful curl of pleasure skittering through Nil’s nerves, lingering like liquid heat in his veins. With the fire magic heating up his own, Nil can think a bit quicker, but it still takes him a good few seconds to remember that they’re searching for their curious snapper, not a place to be intimate. “Oh… yes. Geinkiin,” Nil says finally, though he’s unable to keep from leaning into Sutok’s hand. “I was wondering why I wasn’t kissing this sweet boy holding my hand… I suppose being on a rescue mission is a pretty good reason.” </p>
<p>He tries to smile, to reassure his nervous companion in some way, but judging by Sutok’s expression the little quirk of his lips isn’t very effective. Nil squeezes his hand gently, allowing himself one more quick kiss to savor the dying embers of feeling before looking to the ward again. “I think that croak came from a little ways beyond here. Geinkiin might have woken up one of the toads with his ‘sneaking’.” </p>
<p>Sutok can’t help a chuckle, remembering the handful of times Geinkiin had demonstrated his stealth - and woken up half of the manticores by tripping on his own feet. Turning to the ward, Sutok makes the familiar gestures to activate his magic and let them inside. “Yes, let me just -” Sutok clears his throat, still a little frazzled by the memory of Nil’s cool lips on his own. Sure, ice dragons were a little chilly to the touch, but being with Nil was like kissing someone who’d wandered in the Southern Icefield for years and never quite thawed out. <em> Is it… normal for someone to be this cold? </em> </p>
<p>For once, it’s Nil nudging Sutok to get his attention, nodding at the ward to remind him of the task at hand. “Right! Yes, here, let’s be really quiet…” Sutok hears a quiet puff of breath behind him as his magic activates the ward, but dutifully pretends not to notice - even as Nil’s hand squeezes him tighter and his arm slowly curls around his waist to press his body snug against Sutok’s back. He has to take a shaky breath to steady himself, but Sutok manages a soft, “Caller, I hope Geinkiin is okay,” without his voice sounding too wrecked. </p>
<p>With a contemplative hum, Nil hooks his chin over Sutok’s shoulder, quite unwilling to pull away from the lingering warmth in the other imperial’s runes. “As long as he died only in the past twenty minutes I am confident I can heal him - thirty if we are lucky,” Nil says, simply but not unkindly. </p>
<p>Sutok opens his mouth to make some sort of horrified but impressed noise, but before he can make a sound he spots the muddy, hulking figure of their missing snapper, happily scribbling notes in his field journal. “Geinkiin!” Sutok hisses as loud as he dares, glancing deeper into the cave where he knows one of the underground ponds runs. </p>
<p>With a little jerk of surprise Geinkiin turns toward them, smiling brightly when he notices Nil pressed so close. “Catcher, I sure am glad you guys are getting along!” he says, giving Sutok a knowing smirk that makes a reflexive blush heat his cheeks. Nil hardly seems to notice, though, too busy nuzzling into the warmth of his neck and soaking up any residual fire magic clinging to his runes. “I can’t believe I haven’t seen the wartoad yet - I thought for sure tripping over their feeding trough would make enough noise to draw them out. Not that I did that on purpose! Well maybe a little. I <em> really </em> wanna see one.” Geinkiin cocks his head to the side, just now noticing Sutok’s eyes have gone wide and are definitely looking behind him rather than at him. </p>
<p>“Geinkiin, buddy, did I tell you about the little tadhops that hatched?” Sutok says, voice quite level despite the fact that two huge eyes were now blinking at him from the darkness mere feet behind Geinkiin. “They’re so young they still have their tadpole tails. Would you want to -” </p>
<p>Before he can finish, Geinkiin has stowed his journal and sprinted toward them and the ward, happily crowing “baby frogs baby frogs baby frogs!” as he runs. There’s an angry, rumbling croak from the darkness but Sutok gets the ward open and closed in record time, making a note to ask Geinkiin sometime how he gets through them. </p>
<p>Reassured that his friend is unharmed, Sutok lets himself visibly relax, even tilting his head to let it rest against Nil’s where he’s snuggled into his shoulder. It takes Geinkiin’s smug little smirk for Sutok to realize it’s been an awkwardly long silence, finally breaking it with an uncomfortable cough. “So, uh, tadhops,” Sutok says. “They’re, um… where are they… ah! I put them near the wavehoppers, since they have similar diets. I can show you the way, Geinkiin - the handful of caves down there have all sorts of frog-like familiars I think you’d like to see.” </p>
<p>With a grin, Geinkiin loops his arm with Sutok’s, gesturing for him to lead the way. It’s slow going with Nil seemingly unaware of the awkwardness of being spooned up against Sutok’s back, but Geinkiin is happy to pass the time chatting about his plans for the museum in the Tavern. </p>
<p>When they reach the smaller cave system and the air is filled with the sound of tiny croaks (and Geinkiin’s excited bouncing), Geinkiin untangles himself from Sutok’s arm and takes out his journal again. “I know this part of the caves pretty well, and I think tadhop babies could occupy me for…” Geinkiin looks them over, gaze lingering on Nil’s sleepy expression, and can’t help a fond smile spreading over his face. “…a couple hours at least. Is there anything special you want to show Nil, Sutok? He really likes snakes, has a pet one back at the Tavern.” </p>
<p>Sutok tilts his head to try to see Nil’s face at the odd angle, but his pale eyes are closed and Sutok feels his own heart stutter out of rhythm. He’s a little self-conscious of the fact he still can’t feel an equally eager heartbeat thrumming in Nil’s chest, even pressed as close as they are, but his content expression is surprisingly reassuring. “You have a snake?” Sutok says, rather belatedly after his moment of contemplation. </p>
<p>Eyes still closed, Nil nods slowly. “Her name is Suyah,” he says. “A boa.” </p>
<p>Sutok brightens, only barely catching Geinkiin’s wave of farewell as he clomps off to the first little pool. Taking that as their own cue to go, Sutok waves back and turns to the corridor they’d entered through, pulling a complacent Nil behind him. </p>
<p>“That’s a pretty name, does it mean something?” Sutok asks, glad he doesn’t need to think to navigate them back to his room - Nil is a deadweight that only gets heavier with each pulse of magic Sutok sends out to light their way, and it takes most of his concentration to keep him steady and moving. </p>
<p>“It means ‘hug,’” Nil finally says, after a pause so long Sutok almost forgets what he’d asked. He’s glad he did, though, smiling in charmed delight. </p>
<p>“That’s so sweet! I have a boa too, actually - his name is Zahvan.” At Nil’s soft noise of vaguely questioning interest, Sutok elaborates. “It means ‘taste’ - he, um, loves to lick things. So that’s your warning I guess. You would like to meet him, yes?” Sutok asks, suddenly unsure. It’s a bit rude of him to just drag Nil around without asking, even if he goes happily enough. </p>
<p>“Yes,” Nil answers, and even if his voice is still fairly toneless, the relative quickness of his response reads as enthusiasm. </p>
<p>“Okay then,” Sutok says, smiling as he ducks through the archway that leads to his own cave - the only one so far without a ward across it. “Um, make yourself comfortable,” Sutok says, a little flustered again as he looks at his room with an outsider’s eyes - the table with one chair, laden with papers and open books; the haphazard pile of clothing in one corner; the lumpy straw mattress tucked behind a half-wall, the blankets on it tangled up in a ball at the foot. “Sorry for the mess… I suppose the bed’s the best place if we’d both like to sit.” </p>
<p>Nil doesn’t move, so Sutok gives him a minute, then tentatively asks, “Um, did you want to sit or…?” </p>
<p>He feels a soft puff of breath against his neck, Nil’s arms resettling around his waist. “You said, ‘make yourself comfortable.’ This is comfortable.” </p>
<p>Sutok gives a shaky chuckle, feeling himself flush. “O-oh. Right, okay. Just, um, over here then.” Nil in tow, he shuffles across the room to the large tank in the corner where the thick coils of his snake’s body shine in the low light. “Zahvan gets to be in here with me… don’t tell the others, but he’s my favorite. He’s been my companion for years.” Sutok disentangles an arm and reaches down into the tank, concentrating briefly to send a pulse of heat to his hand. </p>
<p>Nil sighs against his neck again, and Sutok shivers as Zahvan raises his head, tongue flicking out inquisitively. “Come here, sweetie, I’d like you to meet someone,” Sutok croons softly, and Zahvan agreeably lets himself be scooped up, looping his body in heavy coils over Sutok’s arms. Sutok <em> can </em> bear both Nil and Zahvan’s weight for now, but he’s sure they’ll be here for a while, so he heads for the bed. “Here, Nil, you can sit and then we can both take a look at him,” Sutok says, gently urging Nil down to the scratchy mattress. </p>
<p>When he sits down a moment later, Nil quickly scoots up behind him to loop his arms around his chest again, his cheek resting against Sutok’s shoulder. “So, here he is,” Sutok says, lifting Zahvan’s head up towards Nil’s. Zahvan promptly flicks his tongue out and licks Nil’s nose. “Yeah, there he goes,” Sutok says, laughing softly. “That’s his way of saying hi.”</p>
<p>Nil blinks slowly, turning his head to rest his chin on Sutok’s shoulder and study the snake. Its tongue licks out again, tickling Nil’s skin, and Sutok swears he can feel a little smile against his shoulder. “Aren’t you such a sweet thing,” Nil murmurs, untangling an arm from its tight hold around Sutok’s chest to lightly brush a finger over Zahvan’s smooth head. “Such a bright color pattern on you… I dare say almost as pretty as Suyah.” </p>
<p>Carefully, Nil runs cool fingers down Zahvan’s long coils, letting his hand drop away when the snake starts to curl uncomfortably. “Sorry,” Nil sighs, looping his arm around Sutok’s waist instead. “I know I’m cold. You’re not used to it like Suyah is.” </p>
<p>The little smile melts away, and immediately Sutok aches to feel it again. “It’s okay!” Sutok says quickly. “You just have to um… get your hands a bit warmer.” Nil makes a soft, acknowledging noise, the hand at Sutok’s chest drifting down slightly to find someplace warmer. He hears a sharp intake of breath as it brushes over a nipple, curiously sliding back up to rub against it again and sighing at the resultant burst of fire magic in the air. </p>
<p>“This can help get me warm…” Nil murmurs plainly, far less sultry than Sutok would think considering his other hand has also drifted lower to rest on his stomach, just above the hem of his pants. Eager to chase the mounting fire magic in the air, Nil presses a soft kiss to the side of Sutok’s neck, enjoying another pulse of magic that skitters over his skin. In the back of his mind he remembers <em> something </em> Sutok said about his pants, but he can’t for the <em> life </em> of him remember what it was… carefully, giving the other imperial plenty of time to say something, Nil traces a cool finger along the hem of Sutok’s pants, not being able to help a pleased sigh against his ear at the resulting flutter of Sutok’s magic.</p>
<p>Breath stuttering at Nil’s unintentionally teasing touch, it takes Sutok a long moment to gather his scattered thoughts. “Ah - Nil,” he says, carefully but quickly shifting Zahvan over to his left arm. The snake gives a soft hiss but begins coiling himself there instead as Sutok rests his freed hand over Nil’s, gently urging it back up to the safer territory of his belly. “I don’t know if you remember… well, regardless. I’m not comfortable with anything happening down there until we know each other a bit better.” Sutok turns his head to give Nil a smile, wanting to soften the words. </p>
<p>It falters when he sees Nil’s expression, subtle as it is. The other imperial’s eyes are still downcast as he gives a soft “I’m sorry,” his cool hands starting to draw back. Sutok quickly presses the one under his hand more firmly to his stomach. </p>
<p>“Really, it’s alright - more than alright, really.” Sutok tilts his head back a bit farther to press a kiss to Nil’s cheek, hoping that will show him that he’s not averse to <em> all </em> touches… just the overly familiar ones. Nil still won’t meet his eyes, so Sutok reaches back to cradle his face in his hand, tilting his chin up so he can press the next kiss to Nil’s mouth. Exhaling a soft breath of the fire magic Nil seems to crave is instinctive at this point. “Does that feel better?” Sutok murmurs, pulling back to watch Nil’s face again. “There are other ways to get warm, right?”</p>
<p>Nil shivers, nerves sparking to life again enough to realize he’s cold. Instinctively he pulls Sutok tighter against his chest, tilting his chin in invitation until the other imperial leans in to kiss him again. The fresh burst of magic feels so good Nil can’t help a quiet whine into his mouth, a sound that makes Sutok gasp and his hand tighten around Nil’s. </p>
<p>In the back of Nil’s mind he’s so damn <em> frustrated </em> with himself for forgetting what Sutok told him, fretting about accidentally pushing his boundaries, but it does not take long for him to slowly be reassured by Sutok’s insistent touches and soft kisses. The fire magic seeping into Nil’s veins seems to have thawed him out somewhat, each touch so much more pleasurable and <em> intense </em> than before. It was so hard to remember the last time he’d <em> felt </em> this much, and the novelty was as exciting as the touch itself. </p>
<p>“Yes, there are other ways to get warm,” Nil says belatedly, suddenly remembering Sutok had spoken. “Obviously finding warm spots is the easiest, but those are usually under clothing and I will not do that until we… ‘know each other better’, I believe you said. The other way is…” He pauses, a hand sliding down Sutok’s left arm to gently pet the coiled snake. His skin must be significantly warmer, as Zahvan lets him stroke careful fingers over his long coils. </p>
<p>For a minute or so Nil is captured by the flick of the snake’s tongue and the feeling of scales under his fingers, before he finally turns back to Sutok’s curious expression. “You’re a fire dragon, and a mage too, so it’s easier for you to consciously control the flow of your magic, but it also means that your emotions release more passive magic than a non-mage would. I’m very… sensitive to all types of magic, but especially fire and lightning, which is why being so close to you feels so… incredible.” </p>
<p>Sutok blushes, and Nil can’t help leaning into the warmth and pressing a kiss to his reddened cheek. “Your emotions and pleasure send a lot of magic into the air, which helps me warm up and somewhat stops my nerves from being so numb all the time. So, when you feel good, I feel wonderful as well.” Nil slides his hand from Zahvan to rest on Sutok’s chest again, carefully brushing his thumb over a nipple to provoke a soft gasp and sharp spike of fire magic, the latter making Nil sigh blissfully against Sutok’s ear. He didn’t say this was off limits, and it certainly seemed to conjure a lot of passive magic… “If you’d like to get me warm, I will need to know what feels pleasurable to you. This, perhaps? I do enjoy being very close to you. I can also try to give you a massage - I have been told that is something dragons objectively find pleasurable.”</p>
<p>“T-that’s…” Sutok’s voice shakes, and he takes a deep breath in an attempt to steady it. For any other faults Nil might have, he’s certainly patient, his own soft breaths a gentle rhythm against Sutok’s ear as he waits for him to keep speaking. “That does feel… very good.” Nil hums agreeably and rubs Sutok’s nipple again, echoing his exhaled breath of pleasure a moment later. “But I, ah - I don’t think I could turn down a massage if you’re offering.” </p>
<p>Inara does make a point of telling him how tense he is whenever he visits, but Sutok isn’t sure he could comfortably accept a massage from her or her husband. He’s sure they could all be adults about it, but as much as he likes the both of them, it’s hard to truly relax around them. Why it should be different with this almost-stranger Sutok couldn’t say, but gods if his hands don’t feel <em> incredibly </em> good, even in these teasing brushes. So good, in fact, that getting them away from such sensitive territory for a little while would probably be advisable. </p>
<p>“First, though, I - I don’t want to offend you, but I have to ask - you’re not offering <em> just </em> because of my fire magic, are you?” Sutok knows that it will take Nil longer than a moment to answer, probably still processing the question right now, but he hastens to add, “I wouldn’t think poorly of you for it. But it would help me - manage my expectations, I suppose.” Sutok’s shoulders tense, bracing for disappointment. He thinks he could stand an afternoon with these wonderful touches even if there wasn’t any feeling behind them, but if it went on longer, a hollow exchange of pleasure for feeling… he’s not sure it would be any good for him at all.</p>
<p>Nil frowns at the new strain in Sutok’s shoulders, dropping a light kiss on his neck in hopes of helping him relax. The tension lingers, though, and Nil starts to feel a guilty weight settle in his stomach. “I am going to think about the best way to phrase my response,” he says quietly. “If it take an unreasonably long time, please don’t be afraid to nudge me and remind me what we were talking about. I will try very hard to stay on track but I… well, as I’m sure you’ve noticed, my mind tends to wander uncontrollably.” </p>
<p>He smiles a little against Sutok’s shoulder, more embarrassed than because he finds it funny, but the fact he can <em> feel </em> enough to feel embarrassed is exciting in and of itself. </p>
<p>Sutok nods quickly, assuring him to “take your time,” and Nil nuzzles comfortably into the other imperial’s neck. It’s so warm, and the eager flutter of Sutok’s pulse under his skin is at the same time soothing and enticing - a steady rhythm that lulls him into relaxing but also a sign of <em> exactly </em> how much Sutok was enjoying his touch, and that reminder makes Nil sigh happily and pull him tighter against his chest. <em> Am I really just here for his magic? Would I care so much about Sutok being happy if I was? Is the simple fact I want to see him smile rather than just in ecstasy proof I care about more than his magic? Am I even physically </em> capable <em> of caring about him? </em> </p>
<p>Nil feels Sutok tip his head back, a quiet murmur of “you still with me?” on his lips. Nil nods, and Sutok says, “It’s been a little while, so do you remember…?” </p>
<p>Nil quickly assures him, “Yes, sorry, I just need a bit longer to manage my own capabilities and expectations.” </p>
<p>Sutok nods and drops a quick kiss on his cheek. “I’m gonna put Zahvan away then, okay? He looks like he needs a nap almost as much as you do.” Sutok’s voice is teasing but gentle, carefully reaching up to brush a dark circle under Nil’s eye. Nil is already having enough trouble discerning what exactly he wants from Sutok and can offer in return, and decides that explaining “I physically don’t need sleep but I’m tired all the time” will be a topic for later. </p>
<p>Reluctantly Sutok pulls away from Nil’s arms, stretching as he stands and blushing when he notices Nil’s gaze lingering on him. As quickly and gently as he can he untangles Zahvan from his arm, getting an appreciative hiss in response as the snake slithers under his favorite rock. A fond smile tugs Sutok’s lips as he watches him, lost for a moment thinking about when he was just a little hatchling, before Nil’s voice catches his attention again. </p>
<p>“At first it was just physical. You activated the wards and the feeling of your magic in my nerves was enthralling - I needed more of it. I knew being close to you and giving you pleasure could evoke more magic, and I was prepared to do whatever I could to accomplish that but…” Nil brushes his hair behind his ear and out of his face, looking up from the floor to meet Sutok’s gaze and feeling immediately bolstered by his encouraging expression. “…but then you kissed me, and yes it felt good to have that fire magic inside me, but it… <em> just </em> felt good, which is odd for me. I usually know the physical reason I like something, but being kissed by you was just a purely wonderful experience. I wanted you to do it again, not just because of the magic, but because I am so entranced by <em> you</em>. I’d… I’d want to kiss you and be close to you even if your magic didn’t help me.”</p>
<p>Sutok’s face heats as he tries for a moment to hide how affected he is by Nil’s matter-of-fact explanation, but he can’t be dishonest when Nil has given him so much truth of his own. His expression softens further as he steps back towards the bed, crouching down to be at Nil’s level again. “Thank you, it really helps to hear that,” he murmurs, raising a hand to brush back the hair that seems determined to fall into Nil’s eyes. He lets his hand linger against his cheek, angling Nil’s head to press another warm kiss against his lips, his eyes falling closed. </p>
<p>For a moment he slips into a fantasy of pressing closer yet, feeling Nil’s chest against his, sliding into his lap to feel even more of him - but no. Sutok’s already flushing deeper at the runaway fantasy, and he’s sure actually <em> doing </em> it would put him into a fluster that he couldn’t recover from. </p>
<p>Instead he breaks away with a sigh, eyes opening just in time to catch Nil’s little shiver at the hot breath against his lips. “Still want to… how did you say it… ‘evoke more magic’ with a massage?” Sutok asks quickly, before he can become too distracted. </p>
<p>Nil blinks, taking a moment to process before he gives a slow nod. </p>
<p>“Okay then. Scoot back a bit for me?” Nil obliges as quickly as he always does, and Sutok turns his back to sit in front of him again, edging backwards until he feels the solid coolness of his body. “That work for you?” Sutok asks, brushing his own hair out of the way as he glances back to Nil. </p>
<p>Sutok gets that same enigmatic nod in return before Nil settles both hands on Sutok’s shoulders. Even as Sutok tries to focus on that rather than the pressure - or rather, lack of pressure - he feels from the other imperial’s pelvis pressed tight against him, it still takes a few moments for him to register the gentle brushes of Nil’s fingers over his shoulders. “You can, uh… press harder?” Sutok tries, suppressing a shiver at the light, almost tickling touches. <em> Does he think he’s going to break me? </em></p>
<p>“Are you sure? I would not want to hurt you.” Nil lets his thumbs press a little harder at Sutok’s answering nod, starting to knead the tight knots that seem to be littered over the other imperial’s shoulders. The little sounds of Sutok’s breath help guide him to find the right pressure, focusing on the spots that make it hitch in pleasure. Sutok’s back is covered in scars, old pale ones under a dozen pink, fresh ones, and Nil can’t help starting to muse about where they probably came from. <em> This one is a harpy… this looks like a bonepicker bite… oh, this one’s deep. A wraith hound. </em> </p>
<p>Nil leans down to press a soft kiss over the mark, tracing the long row of teeth scarred into Sutok’s back. It must have hurt a <em> lot </em> - beasts from the Ruins always had some horrid disease in their bites that could cause more pain than the bite itself. “Your work is dangerous,” Nil says plainly. </p>
<p>Sutok gives a little jolt in his arms, not expecting him to break the long silence so suddenly and, if he’s honest with himself, completely absorbed in the feeling of Nil’s lips and careful fingers over his skin. “Oh, uh, yeah, it can be,” Sutok says, doing his very best to hold back a moan as Nil kneads a particularly tense spot at the crook of his neck. “Familiars can… ahh… get a little nervous when you handle them.” The little breath of pleasure he let escape makes Sutok blush, but Nil’s steady touch doesn’t falter even a moment. Each slide of his cool fingers feels warmer, the fire magic elicited by Sutok’s pleasure starting to seep into his extremities. </p>
<p>Nil is not sure how long they’ve sat there, Sutok almost starting to purr under Nil’s gentle kisses and firm massage, but he feels absolutely <em> saturated </em> in magic. It tingles in his nerves, warms his skin, and makes an unfamiliar but wholly pleasurable heat start to pool in his belly. It’s instinctive to jerk his hips slightly against Sutok, immediately awash in a delightful burst of bliss, but the other imperial makes a startled little gasp and drops a hand to Nil’s leg. </p>
<p>“I’m sorry, did that hurt?” Nil frets, starting to press a line of apologetic kisses up Sutok’s neck. “I’m not sure what that was, just… a sudden warmth and enjoyment that felt even better getting closer to you.” Nil cocks his head to the side, not understanding the dark color in Sutok’s cheeks and how it spreads down his chest. <em> Am I embarrassing him? What did I do wrong? </em> “I’m so sorry Sutok… listen, my magic is very powerful and I know how to heal some scars. Is that something you would like? So I can make it up to you?”</p>
<p>Sutok struggles to process Nil’s words, mind still firmly stuck on the feeling of his body pressed against him, hot and hard at last. <em> I suppose I no longer have to doubt he feels anything for me at least… even if I was wholly unprepared for that. </em> </p>
<p>The hasty kisses against his neck slow, Nil’s breath sighing out over Sutok’s skin. “I’m so sorry,” he repeats, voice low and lost. </p>
<p>Blinking, Sutok forces himself out of his stunned daze. “You don’t need to apologize - or, I forgive you anyway,” he says quickly, shooting a flustered smile over his shoulder. “I just didn’t expect - well, I understand. It’s perfectly natural to react like that. I, um…” Sutok trails off, belatedly realizing that calling attention to the tented fabric of his own pants, while possibly reassuring, would likely not give Nil the right idea about his boundaries. “I’m sorry, I’m not being very clear.” Nil doesn’t disagree, waiting quietly for Sutok to continue. “It’s… nice, actually, to know that I can affect you like that. But it is a little more than I’m comfortable with right now. You don’t have to make anything up to me, but…” Sutok glances back, biting his lip. “Can you really heal scars? Most of them don’t bother me, but that wraith hound bite - the one you, ah -” Sutok flushes and looks away again. “The one you were kissing. It still aches sometimes. Could you… do anything about that?”</p>
<p>“Yes, absolutely!” Nil breathes, excitement making him talk at a normal pace for once. He’s so relieved Sutok isn’t annoyed with him - <em> why do I keep doing things that make him uncomfortable? </em> As wonderful as it felt to press closer to the other imperial, Nil is far more concerned with making sure he doesn’t get embarrassed again. “Bites from beasts in the Ruins are particularly nasty, but I have… rather uncommon healing abilities. I have been told it’s a very odd sensation but not painful… it shouldn’t take long, though, since your magic makes it a bit easier for me to stay on task.” He smiles a little, and Sutok swears he can feel its warmth against his skin. “I, um… I usually forget what I’m doing and get lost easily, but with you making me all toasty warm…” Nil pauses to press a soft kiss to Sutok’s shoulder. “…it’s like my mind actually knows what it’s doing and wants nothing more than to focus on you and make you happy. It’s all I want.” </p>
<p>As cute as the dark blush spreading down Sutok’s chest again is, Nil is determined to do what he asked, and regretfully pulls away from the other imperial’s warmth to sit up straighter. With a slow, centering breath, he lays his hands along the long bite mark on his back, feeling out the pain settled deep under Sutok’s skin. It probably didn’t hurt now, but definitely ached when a storm was approaching, or around other wraith hounds… a nasty disease to be sure. Nil closes his eyes, reaching out with the ice magic coursing through him and letting it meld with Sutok’s own magic. </p>
<p>Sutok shivers a little, almost able to hear the hiss of steam as their magic clashes in his veins, but it doesn’t <em> hurt </em> exactly… just an odd, heavy numbness starting to creep along his back and slide down his arms.</p>
<p>Nil’s touch gets firmer, his brow knitting together as his magic works its way deeper, riding the lines of Sutok’s own powerful magic. As the icy magic slithers its way closer to the churning disease left by the wraith hound’s bite, Sutok’s breath starts to pick up, suddenly nervous. <em> Is this safe? Aren’t bites from undead incurable? What is this going to do to me? </em> </p>
<p>He opens his mouth to say something, to tell Nil to stop, but Nil’s cool breath against his ear makes him bite his lip. “Relax, Sutok, it’s just the disease making you nervous… it wants to stay. It knows I’m trying to remove it. Here…” One of Nil’s hands slips away from his back to slide gently down his arm, finally lacing their fingers together. Immediately, Sutok squeezes his hand tightly. “We’re almost done. I’m not going to hurt you.” </p>
<p>Something sinister in Sutok’s chest commands him to pull away, to fight this chilly magic, but something much stronger wants to believe Nil’s words and he does his best to stay still. He can feel the moment Nil presses deep enough for his magic to ensnare the lingering disease, a sharp jolt in his stomach like missing a step on the stairs making him gasp. “It’s a sticky one,” Nil mutters, mostly to himself as he closes his eyes tighter to concentrate. Sutok lets his head fall back on Nil’s shoulder, sweat starting to glisten on his skin as his breathing grows labored. It doesn’t hurt, Nil was right about that, but it is <em> stressful </em> - a panic he doesn’t even understand spikes in him each time he feels a tendril of Nil’s magic prod the disease. Only Nil’s reassuring squeeze of his hand and soft murmurs of encouragement keep him from bolting. </p>
<p>It feels like hours to Sutok, but it takes barely a minute for the disease to finally release itself, the churning mass feeling like sludge as it runs along the lines of Sutok’s magic and back toward Nil. All at once the icy numbness and heavy ache of the disease leave him, and Sutok breathes a shaky sigh of relief. The sudden pleasure of relief hits him like a tidal wave, making his muscles weak as he slumps against Nil’s chest. “Gods, that was… wow. That was intense,” Sutok gasps, turning his head slightly to be able to see Nil. He’s startled to find the other imperial with his eyes still closed, and even a tentative “Nil…?” doesn’t rouse him. His breaths are slow and even, and if Sutok didn’t know any better he’d swear he was… asleep. Asleep and very <em> very </em> hard.</p>
<p>It’s only the prominent erection pressed against him that convinces Sutok that taking that disease from him hadn’t hurt Nil somehow - surely he couldn’t respond like this if he were gravely injured… right? “Nil?” Sutok repeats, still soft, but this time with a gentle nudge to his shoulder. Nil’s breathing hitches, but then returns to the slow, even breaths of someone deeply asleep. “Nil,” he tries again, at normal volume this time, and when he barely stirs Sutok has to assume he needs the rest. </p>
<p>Still… the angle of his neck can’t be comfortable, slumped against Sutok’s shoulder like that. It’s with mingled embarrassment and relief that Sutok pulls away, unable to resist a quick glance down. He flushes horribly. Yes, certain parts of Nil are still very much awake. His distraction breaks when Nil’s body nearly topples into him, likely chasing the heat of him on instinct, even unconscious. “Shh, just a minute,” Sutok murmurs, steadying Nil and then lowering him to the bed. It only takes a moment to pull Nil’s legs up and arrange his head on one of the pillows, but even that small delay leaves the slightest furrow between his brows, his fingers cooler again when Sutok takes his hand. </p>
<p>“Oh… you need me, don’t you?” Sutok murmurs, unaccountably pleased by the thought. He hesitates as he moves to join Nil again - would it be better to hug him, the better to surround him with warm fire magic, or lay in his arms, the better for Nil to octopus around him like he so clearly enjoys? </p>
<p>Glancing down at the tent in his own lap, he opts for the second, scooting back to curl into the curve of Nil’s body. As expected, the other imperial’s arms slide around him, nuzzling into the back of his neck. Sutok swallows heavily as he feels Nil’s hard length against his ass again, shuddering with suppressed longing. <em> Gods, he feels so good… and it’s been so long… </em> Sutok drops a hand to knead over the front of his own pants, even that brief relief making him bite his lip on a soft moan. <em> Calm down, Sutok. Just let yourself enjoy a good, snuggly nap with this man, it’s far more than you’d expected. </em></p>
<p>The brief touch helps to take the edge off enough that Sutok lets himself truly relax. His arm gently rests on Nil’s where it curls around his chest, smiling when he notices that the other imperial’s fingers are warm again. The little burst of pleasure from Sutok touching himself makes Nil sigh quietly against his ear, starting to press lazy kisses to any skin he can reach while pressed so close. Sutok blushes, surprised the stoic man is so affectionate even when he’s sleeping, but absolutely aching for the sweetness. </p>
<p>With a jolt he realizes he can feel Nil’s ice magic reaching out for him, and for a moment he’s worried it’ll be unpleasant like removing the disease, but when the magic meets Sutok’s own it almost… tickles? Just a gentle caress of that cool ice magic like aloe on hot, burned skin. Sutok makes a soft noise of contentment at the feeling, so pleased to be close to someone he can’t stop grinning. </p>
<p>They lay tangled together for long moments, Sutok starting to drift as well under the rhythm of Nil’s worryingly slow breathing, but he still turns his head toward the other imperial when he gasps and finds his eyes blinking slowly open. “Good nap?” Sutok murmurs, reaching back to brush Nil’s cheek. Nil blinks a couple times, brows knit together in confusion, so Sutok hastily adds, “You fell asleep after taking that disease from me. I laid us down.” </p>
<p>It takes a couple moments, but Nil finally nods, pupil-less eyes so full of a pure trust that makes Sutok’s stomach curl delightedly. “Sorry, I should have warned you,” Nil mumbles. “I don’t sleep. Or, rather, it’s very rare. I’ve been told I don’t need to, that my body runs on something else and it doesn’t need sleep to recharge, but I’m… still very tired. All the time. And sometimes when I get a lot of magic in me, it’s like it shuts off whatever is keeping me awake and I… just immediately succumb to exhaustion.” He smiles a little, unable to help himself when Sutok is looking at him with that much soft adoration even when Nil told him something so outlandish. </p>
<p>“It’s okay Nil, I’m happy to help you sleep,” Sutok says, dropping a quick kiss to his lips. “Thank you for telling me, it helps me have a better idea of what’s going on so I can… react properly. If there’s anything else I should know, please don’t be afraid to tell me. It’s not going to change how I… well, how I feel about you.” </p>
<p>Honestly, even Sutok is surprised these feelings have developed so quickly, but Nil is just so open and genuine about his intentions that it’s hard to keep his rigid barriers so strong. He wants to let Nil in, this man he met just a few hours ago who is already making him feel happier than he’d been in a while. He starts to say something else but Nil’s eyes start to droop again, no doubt affected by the fire magic Sutok’s eager affection is exuding. Instead, Sutok just smiles and kisses him again, unable to help a soft purr when Nil squeezes him tightly and slips back to sleep. Sutok’s lips briefly brush one of the dark circles under Nil’s eyes, so grateful he can help the other imperial get the rest he so clearly needs. </p>
<p>As he settles in to nap as well, he briefly remembers their other companion before assuming (quite correctly) that Geinkiin won’t mind spending a few hours with the baby tadhops while they nap. Sutok smiles to himself as he starts to drift off, confident that this was Geinkiin’s plan all along - make his two lonely friends happy <em> and </em> play with some cute frogs without Sutok fussing over them. As silly as the snapper could be, Sutok had to admit he was a bit of a genius when it came to plots to play with frogs - and, more than that, he genuinely wants his friends to be happy.</p>
  </div></div>
</body>
</html>